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well i was confused but anyway....

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well i was confused but anyway....

Post by sarahd84 on Tue Aug 30, 2011 1:56 pm

completly confused but site change thought my computer was being div and sending me to wrong site.

had my 16 week midwife appointment today, baby all good heard heart beat which was great as i was panicing that there would be something wrong and no heart beat, but there it was and a releived smile apeared on my face.
i told midwife about headaches and how i have been feeling terrible, the weeing problem my back pain, and she just shrugged it off, told me i would just have to deal with back pain, if it got to bad in a few weeks phone her and she will discuss it. the wee problem i dont have a uti, luckly. she said the pressure was probably from everything being slack from having my girls and i said but i didnt give birth i had c sections and surly if it was due to slackness it would make it more than easy to wee. again just shrugged off.

TBH i was not impressed with the attitude nor care given, she didnt seem to know anything, like how many times il be seeing my ob, when they would decide a date to take me in. i said i still wasn sure i wanted the c section which she said stop being silly you dont really have a choice. and then when i said this was the worst of the 3 pregnancys she said well you wont be doing it again then will you, like i was a child being punished. I thought noi wont be but not because of that but because i couldn cope with the emotional rollercoster of ttc again.

On the way home i popped into my gran who retired from midwifery at the same hospital 8 years ago (other than assisting in my eldests birth a few months after she retired) i was quite upset and just wanted to see what she thought, she was in shock, and said when she worked they would have done alot more to reasure me and check that there wasnt an underline reason for me feeling so ill. she has now decided that she wants to call one of her friemds who became a priveate midwife 4 years ago and see if she will take me or at least just check in every so often to double check she is happy with what is being said and going on.

time seems to be going slower now got my pram now i really want baby to put in it

sarahd84

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Re: well i was confused but anyway....

Post by mrsc on Wed Aug 31, 2011 2:12 am

God that's awful! I had one like that a couple of years ago. I was miscarrying on the day of my first appointment with her, she was sat on my sofa listening to me say there's no point in filling in these things because I know what's happening... she just brushed it off as if it were nothing and carried on while I was sat there in tears! I was right, and she should have listened. And so should yours, if you feel that rough then she should look into it further even if it's just to reassure you. And about the c-section, do you really have no choice? Even if that is the case, she should still at least listen to you and sympathise because it can't be easy having your options taken away from you.
I really hope she sorts herself out!!
x

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Re: well i was confused but anyway....

Post by sarahd84 on Wed Aug 31, 2011 3:11 am

i know i have a choice, luckly im able to get hold of a copy of our local nhs guildlins on repeat c sections and it does state in there that unless this is 4th c section there is no nessesity to do a repeat one. and trial by scar is a option.

sadly i think the older midwifes who have been there a very long time are reluctant to give recent information, and i think alot of them have lost there motivation and enthuiasm in the job. understandably really with the way our local nhs is run, we have lost 2 maternity units and now the only local birthing unit. for anyone who lives in my town it is at least a half hour drive now to have baby. the 2 midwifes who run the antinatal care for our area have alot of ladies to see and are the only ones who do the clinic. U can also garentee that you will see one of these 2 up till the birth but you will have completly diffrent midwifes who u have never met deliver baby and do home visit. maternity care in our area sucks. and although i have wanted nothing more than to become a midwife and am working very hard to acheive it, i will do my year compulsery with nhs then be looking into working private until we move over to aus.
so i completly understand her lack of enthusiasm but i do think all woman deserve alittle bit of sensitivity. i know this is my 3rd baby and im a trainee midwife so maybe she assumes im fine and know what to expect. but this pregnancy is very diffrent to my others im noticably more tired than i was with them and after weighing myself last night am now worried about the amount of food im able to consume as im actually loosing weight now.

have an appointment with my grandmothers freind tomorrow so she can just give a second opinion.

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Re: well i was confused but anyway....

Post by Beth and her face on Wed Aug 31, 2011 3:19 am

Sounds like she was a bit of bitch, hugs.... Hopefully your grans friend can help you xxxxxxxxxxxxx

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